Crossing the Threshold

There are times in our lives that are like no other. There are moments when we change, forever. When you had your tenth birthday, you said good-bye to single digit ages - forever. When you lost your last baby tooth, you (hopefully) would never have that funny wiggling sensation again. After your first kiss, you would never again be a person who had never been kissed.

Life is like that and sometimes we pay little attention to the times when we crossed over and yet, other times it is so poignant and significant we remember it for the rest of our lives. It shapes who we are becoming and adds to the construction of our memories and our personality.

Marriage. It is a big change, it is a huge commitment. It is the act of making a promise to be by someone's side as their partner - forever. For some women, it means changing your name. The name that you have had since you were born, will now be erased and a new name will be a part of the new person that you are becoming. This was so significant for me that I pulled away from the idea. My name, I thought, is ME. It is my label. It is who I am. I knew that I wanted a partner, but I did not think that I wanted to change who I am. If you take the label off a carton of milk and change it to say lemonade...nobody will really know what is inside. And, what a terrible shock to someone who assumes that they are pouring lemonade and come out with a glass of milk. I was torn on this, but eventually, I realized that no matter what the label says, the milk... is still milk. What I didn't know at the time, is that I would change right along with my label. I was becoming someone different than I was before. I was becoming a wife, a partner and Mrs. Huffaker. Twelve years later and I am still struggling with who Mrs. Huffaker is, but I think I am getting to know her and ... well, she is pretty cool. Not the same as Miss Yvonne Cutler, but pretty cool nonetheless.

Marriage - threshold