Updates

I have been feeling REALLY good lately (except for the unbearable exhaustion...but, hey...I am a mom!) so I thought that I would share about it!

I have been busy, but not stressing about all of the things that I need to get done. I feel much calmer and more centered, but I am not sure why. I don't know if something is different...or if it is just my state of mind. Yes, I know that means that something is different, but... My days have seemed longer, but my weeks shorter. I have been getting most of my to do lists done, and feeling very calm about it all.

My stomach is good. I have only had to take the Prilosec one day since stopping. Remember, the directions say to take it for 14 days and then, stop. While I was on my scrapbooking retreat, I really ate poorly and paid the price with some serious indigestion, heart burn and general yuckiness so I took one pill and was back on track. I have also been sleeping really well.

The diet continues to be a success too! I have now lost 12 pounds and even though I did not have any loss last week...I know why and I will do better this week. We have been to a lot of parties lately and when faced with all of that yummy food I just have a little bit of everything and end up eating way to many calories. I am starting to think that my goal of 140 is not low enough to look the way that I want to, and I may continue on to try for 135. That would put me at the weight I was when I got married and I think that I looked pretty darn good. Heck, I wore a bikini on our cruise! I will NOT be wearing a bikini any time soon, however... the babies have left their marks and the tummy will never fully recover!

I worked out today! I have continued to walk Gavin to school almost every day, but the morning yoga and strength training never really stuck. My mom and stepdad just opened a gym near my home, in fact...it is closer than Gavin's school! I walked there today and it took me 15 minutes! I did all of the weight machines in two rounds which took me a half hour and then I walked home. I helped Andy prep dinner and then I showered while he finished it up. So, I am all ready for bed, except for brushing my teeth, which I will do as soon as I get off of the computer! (This is major for me, because there are lots of nights that I....fall asleep on the couch watching t.v. and Andy comes to help me get to bed and I just fall in with my clothes on...I know, it is very gross and really does not fit my personality...but... like I said earlier.... I am TIRED!)

The oven did finally get fixed and I can't remember if I told you that or not. But, it did. The correct part was ordered and took 2 weeks to come in, but when it did the technician came right out and it was fixed within 5 minutes. YEAHHH!!! I baked muffins THAT day, and have since made an egg casserole for breakfast, cinnamon rolls, coffee cake, muffins again and a pork roast. I love having my oven back up and running!

We planted quite a bit to get ready for a "Gramma Shower" that we had at our house last weekend. We finished the pots on the porch... that is the photo at the top of the post! We also put some plants into the back yard and patio area. The fountain and the fan on the porch were used during the party and were appreciated by all. I found an inexpensive table, couch and chair set at World Market and we might just go and buy it. I could study on the patio!!!!

My financial aid paperwork is finally completed and I was awarded loans to cover all expenses plus an additional $2000. We talked about not accepting the additional funds, but we are really unsure of how much I will be able to work during my 6 weeks in school, so we will take it and sock it away and use it if we need it. I felt better to be safe, than sorry (and eating beans all summer) I am hoping to buy my books tomorrow and I will be working LATE to try to get all of the stuff done that needs to be done, before I start classes on the 23rd. I am a little nervous, but excited. I got my bookbag, and my folders are labeled....I know that I am a big nerd but it helps me feel like I have some sense of control.

I got to see baby Kelsey this weekend. I not only saw her, but got to hold and cuddle and ooh and goo over her. She is a little itty bity thing, but oh, so sweet. She is one special baby, and we all pray that her life will be one of joy and happiness. She will have challenges, but her parents are ready and willing to do whatever it takes to help her grow and develop. You can follow her story and see her beautiful birth announcement here: http://sweetpeakurtz.blogspot.com/This is Gavin's last week of school and he has grown up so much this year. Less tantrums and lots more cooperation. It seems that in the last two months of school, he has finally gotten the hang of it. We have been having loads of fun and we are going to be reading about Ancient Egypt tonight as we continue to make our way through the "What your 1st Grader Needs To Know" book! The kids are heading in right now, to get ready for bed and Andy is going to go to the gym, so I should wrap this up and get to it.

Summer is right around the corner and we are all excited for the adventures that await!

Tummy Update

I AM CURED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At least, I think I am!!! I forgot to take my meds one night last week, and I had been feeling pretty good, so I thought, "Well, we will see how I do". I was fine on Friday and Saturday, but by Sunday I was feeling not so good and by Monday I was back to square one.

I went online, I talked to my mom, I thought and thought about how I FEEL. My step dad has had heart burn problems for a long time and after talking with him, I decided that maybe...it was acid and that I had "heart burn" from my esophagus to my colon!! I took a Prilosec on Wednesday and felt REALLY good...I had an "anti-feeling" in my guts, like I didn't even know that I HAD guts. (is this the way it is supposed to be?) By the evening time, I was a bit naseuous and went to bed.

Yesterday, I felt GREAT and today my guts are a non-issue. I also think that part of the reason that I over-eat is because I have been trying to quench the burning in my belly... I especially crave sugarary treats, like chocolate. THAT too would make sense considering that sugar is a base...my body craves it to counter balance the acid! As a result, I have had an easier time sticking to my points and not eating so much!

I am going to try the drug for the 14 day cycle and hope that I can get off of it and only take a cycle every now and again when I start to have a problem. I know that my step dad cannot stop taking it, at all.... and I hope that I do not have to do that, but if it keeps my tummy in check. I will. Thanks for your prayers and support, and hopefully, I will not have to spend another day, curled up in pain.

Tummy Troubles

Whoa.. have I got 'em! I have never had the strongest gut, it's where I hold my stress, my worries and my anxiety (of which I carry plenty, as well). As a kid I easily got an upset stomach from worrying about a test or a new teacher or a new school year. At one point, I even had to take medication for it when I was in 4th grade...unfortunately, the stress of being singled out and called down to the office for a daily dose of stomach tranquilizers made my stomach worse!

I have had problems off and on with my "gut"... gas, bloating, belching and pain... my mom will talk your ear off about constipation when I was little, but I will spare you all of the details. Let's just say, that some days are better than others for me and my gut.

After I had Gavin, I had REAL troubles! I was getting so much pain in my intestines that I would be doubled over and could do nothing but lie on the couch watching him roll around. Thankfully he was not crawling yet, so I really could just lie there. I got so sick that I could not even eat chicken broth and mashed potatoes without agonizing pain and upset stomach. The Dr. patted me on the knee and told me, "What do you expect, you just had a baby!". Um... I thought to myself, I expect to be able to eat and not have to call my mom to come and help me get up off of the floor! It got bad enough that I started to vomit daily and let me tell you THAT is not something that I do!!! I was pretty desperate to feel better, and even my milk supply was suffering. I tried herbs, aloe juice, acidophilus, changes in my diet, excluding foods, adding foods and NOTHING helped! EVERY afternoon I was struck with UNBEARABLE pain and cramping that would not subside. I could only lie on my side with a heating pad and sleep it off. I even had to take more time off of work, because I could not make it through a day. My mom took me to the E.R. after the day that I called her from work and was literally on the floor, writhing in pain. Gavin was with me at the office and was napping, but I could not get up. Of course, by the time the Dr's saw me, the "episode" had passed, as it usually did after 4-5 hours (the same amount of time that we were waiting). They did some tests and basically came up with, "I don't know". BUT, they did write me a refferal to a specialist.

Sometime earlier, Andy had similar symptoms and he suffered for quite a while before a Dr. "diagnosed" him with I.B. (iritable bowel syndrome). They put him on a very low dose of Elavil, which is an inti-depressent because it helps to shut down some of the nerve endings that are sending all of these wild messages from the gut. He seemed to respond well to it and after about a year and a half, was off of the meds and doing really well. We went on vacation and on the way home I was hit with an "episode"... we were driving all the way from Sacramento and I spent a good portion of the drive curled into a tiny ball on the floor, moaning. It was awful. When we got home, I had reached a point of desperation after suffering like this for nearly 3 months. I took one of Andy's pills. Now, I KNOW that you are not supposed to share prescriptions, but like I said...I was desperate! I knew that the drug would make me sleepy, so I took it on a Friday when Andy was home. I slept through the WHOLE weekend! I am not kidding! He would bring Gavin in to nurse and I would crash back out. I ate a bit of broth and lots of water, but I really did sleep for nearly 3 days STRAIGHT. So, the first thing that I realized was that I had really gotten myself exhausted. At last, I had finally gotten some MUCH needed rest.

I had my appointment with the specialist later that week and told him that I had taken the meds. He said, "Hey, if we found something that works, let's stick with it!". He also diagnosed me with "irritable bowel", which is really a big catch all for any kind of gut problem that they can't figure out. By the time I got to the specialist however, I was REALLY sick. He told me, "You know when your computer says 'fatal error', well that is what your entire digestive system is doing right now. I had a bladder and kidney infection and was slightly septic from being constipated." He prescribed a couple of other things for me to do, eat and take that would help me get straightened out and he told me to take the Elavil (at an even smaller dose than Andy) for at least 6 months. He explained that often times when a woman has a baby, her body gets "hyper aware" of all of the feelings and goings on in the belly. After the baby is born, the body continues to clue into feelings that it really shouldn't be. Your bowel is always moving and working, but you just don't feel it and you shouldn't. In my case, I did and then some. The discomfort at being aware of my gut, then made my gut react by clamping down, and that would make me upset and then it became a vicious cycle. What he hoped that the medication would do is quiet down those nerves and make them forget to send messages to my brain. Well, it worked!
I only had an episode or two after that period and those were mild enough that I could take a Gas-X and a Tagamet and muddle through. After I had Ella, I was wondering if it would hit me agian. It did. I suffered quite a bit because I was unsure of the effects of the medication, going into my milk, on the baby. I read a great deal about it and finally decided that it was going to be o.k. and better for everyone in the long run. I was able to catch it much sooner this time and did not get nearly as sick. I had a few really tough weekends, but got myself back on track.

Since then I have had occasions where I eat something that does not set right and sends me running for Tagamet and Gas-X. Oh, the Tagamet... I had another Dr. explain to me that when you get an irritation in your bowel from a food, your body makes histamines and then you can get a reaction from THAT. Your bowel will swell and get itchy and sensitive and that can be very painful. Tagamet is an anti-histamine that most people take to help the problem in the stomach (acid indigestion) but that it might be helpful for my intestines. It is... it is like my mini miricle and has saved me many times. Any way, I have been pretty healthy and had no real problems. Until now.

At Christmas time, I like the rest of the country was stricken with that horrible stomach flu. It set the wheel in motion and I have been struggling since then to get my system back on track. Last month, the stress and exhaustion must have finally done me in, because I got to that place where I could not eat without feeling horrible and it was daily. I knew that I would need to get back on the meds, but hesitated becasue I also knew that it would make me SO sleepy and groggy and fuzzy headed. I looked for a weekend that I could just be that way, but none were available so I went ahead. Last Thursday night I took the meds and was out cold by 8:00 p.m. I had a heck of a time waking up the next morning and struggled through my day feeling really out of it. Around 5 p.m. I finally felt like I had all of my brain power back and within a half hour of that, my gut was protesting. I took another dose, smaller this time and went to bed by 8:00 again. The next day I felt pretty clear headed and my gut was nice to me all day until just before bed time.

So, I am back on these meds that make my gut tolerate food and digestion but make me sleepy, fuzzy headed and feel like I just don't care much about anything at all. It is not the perfect solution, but it is the only one that I have, for now. Hopefully I won't need to be on the drugs for long and I can get back to life as normal.